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From the full version of Sunnyside's Lousy Book

New Year’s Eve

New Year’s eve, I got a visit from the next cop. He was a younger guy and most likely just a trainee sent to serve me a summons to appear in court to defend myself from the request for a restraining order file by the bitch next door. I told him of the conspiracy as usual and kept him around for a while to see what I could get out of him. The guy was too much an immature punk to be a cop if you ask me. As soon as he showed up he worked his way over to the entrance door to my shop to help himself to a peak to the things inside. I let him know that he was on private property and he had no right to be there. I said that everything he saw had to be considered confidential and that I in no way was offering him any of it. Although I didn't disclose my inventions to him, I explained him the significance of my truck had and the benefits from it that he was missing out on, and of course how he got took by the very government he was working for. He wasn't the brightest guy in the ball park if you asked me. Just by what he had to touch with his hands told me something. As time went on I realized he must have had a bug on him, but that didn't matter to me because I figured that there had already been a bug in my shop. Just watching his hand was enough for me to suspect that he had been informed. It wasn’t much longer before he arrived to the question he was just dyeing to ask. "Gee, you could put a car on it, couldn’t you?" I just smiled and thought, "Busted.
       Once I got the backup give away; his time was up. I walked him out to the massager car he was driving. He showed me his assault rifle he had stashed in the trunk. I thought to myself, what do we have here? It looks as if we have an innocent looking guy wearing a cop uniform with all the right questions. He’s driving a non-patrol car with assault rifle in the back. (I don’t remember if he even had a pistol on his waist.) Seemed pretty strange for a cop to show up as he did if that was what he was.
       The thing that got me was what the statement the bitch had wrote and handed the judge on the request for a restraining order. It said that I was always getting drunk and causing a nuisance by play my bass. I pointed out to the punk cop that it was New Years Eve and that there wasn't a beer can or liquor bottle in sight and that I hadn't drank any alcohol for over a year.
       The funny thing was that the bitch had signed the statement under this line that mentions the bit about committing perjury. One lie wasn't enough either. She also mentioned that I talked would always talk about the CIA trying to steal my inventions. Well – I always knew that the CIA would be the about last organization that would even have anything to do with the patent industry.

Another hilarious thing about the document the city had just supplied me with, is that on the back side of the summons, the punk cop had served me with gave me the information I needed to know how to handle the situation. It mentioned a thing about being able to make noise if it had something to do about making a livelihood. That meant: for professional reasons, a person had the right to make noise until 10 o’clock at night.
       I’d showed Tom, the paperwork the wanna be cop had given me and he agreed it was slander. I’d never said or even considered the C.I.A. had anything to do with me.
       I got busy on my computer and made up a couple simple forms to have my fellow musicians and bartenders and the patrons at the local night club to fill out and sign as well as one for Tom’s wife to sign.

Statement and declaration:
I _____________ witnessed Dennis James Sattler use my telephone and phone book to call the United States Attorney Office and the Federal Bureau Of Investigation Office in the afternoon of 12-31-98 Signed _________

The last time I saw Tom was the time after he read the rough draft of the story. But he said his wife would not sign the statement for me.
       He said, "Dennis we read your story and we think you're crazy. There is no – ‘they’". He basically tried to tell me that I was crazy.

The other two statements I took down to the night club with me and had friends, musicians, and bartenders sign:

Statement and declaration:

This is a statement to be used to testify that Dennis James Sattler has not bought, used or drank any alcohol beverages in my presents for at least the last twelve months.
       I can strongly disagree with the statement that Dennis James Sattler: stated in: III. Statement of petitioner No. 98602400A His demeanor is very intimidating, at times uses alcohol and mental status questionable as he has stated to others that he thinks People I.E. C.I.A. and or F.B.I. are watching him and stealing his inventions and patents.

Signature Name and Address Phone Number Occupation Time known

The back of the Summons stated: disturbances as far as the ones from noise if it wasn't necessary for businesses of professions; so I thought,” Great, that means I have the right to practice my bass." Therefore I came up with another petition to have signed: Statement and declaration:

I feel in good judgment that Dennis James Sattler is of professional quality musician. Lack of or infrequent practice would be detrimental to his progress in performance and quality of sound and would result in harm and cause impairment of his prospects of being hired as a professional musician. Also Dennis James Sattler frequently wears ear protection in loud atmospheres. Date 1-3-99 to 1-4-99
       Signature Name and Address Phone Number Occupation Time known

Heck, in just an hour or so at the night club I had the forms filled out by about twenty people and I was ready for my day in court.
       I was sure the judge would be informed of my little petition signing party and as I suspected my case was the first to be handled because if I would have been late -- the judge would have issued a restraining order -- and would have been told the bitch to go on home. The surprise was that she had brought the neighbor lady from the east of me on the opposite side of the shop along with her. The ladies made their statements and I was amazed when the lady to the east of me actually helped me out by giving a contradicting remark that actually played into my favor.
       Since the judge knew of the material I had prepared, he was turning down her request for a restraining order before I even got to speak because the egging happened on my property and she was told that she should have just called the police and let them handle the problem in the first place. When it was my turn to speak, the whole ordeal was already over with. I was still wearing my black bikers' jacket and I got down and had a field day with the spotlight of the courtroom filled with people. I could only wonder who was there just to see how I would react. I pointed out the line on the pink piece of paper a told the judge that she had just committed perjury and slander. I pulled out my signed statements and declarations, but the judge just played it off as if it wasn't important. Then I reached into my bag of tricks and pulled out my latest 24 page version of my lousy book. I turned to the audience and said, "This is the 24 page book I've been passing all over town. It mentions the conspiracy that the city of Tacoma has been involved in." I turned to the judge and said, "I'd like you to read this and tell me if you think it warrants an investigation. Give me a call if you have any further questions." He said, "I don't have the time right know, but I will read it later." I should have asked, “How much later?”

It wasn’t long after I arrived back at my shop I received a visit from the neighbor lady from the east of me. She had come over to apologize for appearing in court with the bitch. She said the bitch had asked her to go with her and she didn't know how to say no. Although I had woke her up one night when I was drunk and playing my bass to loud, she said that she really didn't have anything against me and realized that was just an isolated incident. I let her know I even shut down my compressor about 9:30 and put a halt to the grinding at night as a way of trying to be quite. She asked about the trouble with the city and I informed here of the basic story and said I'd supply her with a copy of my book. Then I pointed over to the fence with the Chicago line places on top. "See that hose on the fence." She nodded yes in return. "That wasn't there when I moved in here. Wouldn't you say that's a good way of prevent snagging your pants on the fence?" She looked back at me with an obvious look of suspicion on her face. As her eyebrows raise and the pitch of her voice changed, she said, "Yes, I'd say it is." From there on, I didn't have to say anything more, and it was the end of our conversation.
       Within a day or two, I knocked on her door and gave her a copy of my book. She commented about how much there was and said it would take her a while to read it.
       I said, "That's fine, take your time and when you're done with it, please share it with your friends across the street."
       The people across the street were never afraid of having their kids around me after they got their hands on my book.

The next chapter of Sunnyside's Lousy Book is:

The Lousy Book grows,
originally Scummy Place

Not available yet.

Have you seen the otherBook Excerpts?


> Sunnyside's Lousy Book
> Lousy Book Condensed
> Sunnyside - Good Things
> Stalking Buffy
> Book History
> What Celebrities say
> Book Excerpts
> Site Map
> Rule No. 1-15
> Rule No. 16-39
> Rule No. 40-66
> Rule No. 70-100


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